Year two begins...

I talked with a church leader the other night, someone who knew Corey from his Scouting days long ago. He is a sensitive and very spiritual man who doesn't say anything without thought. I always feel uplifted when I talk to him.

We talked of Corey and my experiences over the last year, what I've learned. Given my occupation working with the mentally ill, the conversation turned in that direction, how I've gathered bits of knowledge from various points as I see strangers deal with some of the same problems Corey had.

We talked about addiction mostly (his career is in the health field also), and the sad, often deadly turn that illness takes. I told him of articles and videos I've seen recently that have pointed out an interesting phenomenon, that those who eventually develop mental illness are statistically much more likely to have tried - even once - alcohol or illicit drugs. That with many people, all it takes is one exposure.

One.

Many things contribute to the disease of addiction, including genetics and depression. Our family tree is filled with alcohol, on both sides. And like many teenagers, he was depressed and moody. When I talked to a grief counselor about my regret for not getting him treatment sooner, his response startled me. "Most teens are depressed at one time or another. Most come out of it, eventually. How were you to know when he crossed the line?"

The alcohol and drugs he used were having a severe effect on his growing brain, skewing his ability to think rationally, to grow emotionally, sabotaging his ability to make and keep happy and fulfilling relationships. Alcohol is a depressant. Avoiding that one substance alone may have saved his life, prolonged it until he grew past the difficult teenage years. No alcohol in his life would have given us time to grow together and enjoy each other as adults, say things we needed to say to each other, to reaffirm our love for each other, to ask for and receive forgiveness. To learn and to love.

If I could sit and talk with any young person for just a moment, I would share that knowledge. That using alcohol or any substance may invite a host of problems that can affect you and your family for the rest of your lives. Don't do it. Not even once. And if you have, stop.

I am thankful for every day we had Corey. Every one. He was a gift, a precious child. A very sensitive soul who laughed and loved easily. I can still hear his giggle and feel his immense hugs. I'm looking forward to the day when I can feel that hug again.

Quote:
There is sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand voices. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love.  ~  Washington Irving